Trudge

‘What are you doing?’ the little girl asked.

I turned around slowly. The corner of my lips felt heavy but I smiled anyway, because I did not wish to taint her with my darkness.

‘Nothing, just thinking,’ I ruffled her hair gently. ‘Are you out with your mommy or daddy today?’

‘Both!’ she replied heartily and ran towards her parents.

I waved to her parents, and turned back to face the sea. The wind is cold. I have been here an hour for a little rest, but my body still felt lifeless, and my eyelids heavy.

So is my heart.

I stared at the bottle of medicine in my hand, freshly prescribed by the pharmacist, and thought, ‘just another bunch of side effects.’

The sea looked enticingly blue and the wind was picking up as night falls. I take a deep breath of the cold autumnal and slightly salty air, as tears threatened to fall.

‘Tears with no meaning falling from a shell of blackness,’ I mused.

With great reluctance, I peeled myself off the bench, and continued on my dreary trudge home.